Africa
Unite! Newz
‘Positive
Vibrations for the African Nations!
Volume
1. No 1.May
2014
Editors
Note: This
is our first edition of” Africa
Unite News”
and we have many positive,
constructive and informative
news articles and stories, poems and artworks-and good info on what’s
happening in our country of South Africa – as well as in the rest
of Africa- as a movement for African Unity we are not only a
political entity; but an informational entity… and there are so
many stories waiting to be told… This is the goal of this free
E-newzine. To show that Africa
is Alive!
In
this our first edition for May 2014, we will have the story of a
volunteer and her first impressions of her life as a school teacher
in Malawi.
We
hope it will inspire you with how Europeans think about us in Africa
when they come to volunteer their time, energy and skills (and
money). Plus we want to encourage all of you to take a leap of faith
to go volunteering and make a difference in our common human
evolution- whether it’s in your own community- or in another
country. Take a chance and you never know what may happen! …you
might even fall in love!...yeah!
We
are after all; part of One Greater “Ubuntu” Family!
And
every day is a grand new adventure! Africa
shall be One! Africa shall be free! Africa shall be united! Vuka
Ukhanya! Arise & Shine!
Smiles
& BIG LOVE!….Robin D.
Editor
Confessions
of a Volunteer in Africa!
“This
is the “unauthorized” biography of my first trip to Africa as a
volunteer…enjoy these snapshots of my life- and be inspired “to
do it anyway”…yeah-no
matter what the obstacle ;or how hurt your” city of heart”
is…HOPE
is greater than your suffering…!-and
there’s something
inside so
strong, so very strong…!-it’s
your Spirit…so find the Light; and you will find the Love! Find the
Love; and you find the water for your soul...and if you find that…you
will never be thirsty again!
I promise.
Enjoy!
Love you all…God bless-”Miss
P”
A
poem :
“Falling into Silence”
I
am Falling
Into
Silence
Naked
in my soul
In
front of you
Betrayed
by myself
And
by trusting you…
I
am Calling
Into
silence
You
stopped hearing now
I
am hiding
Into
Silence
Not
to get hurt;
How?
Feeling
your skin
Feeling
your touch
Heartbeat
And
your breath
Be
Brave
And
face
What’s
in your heart?
And
what we used to have…
Falling
into silence.
……………………………………………
1.First
Impressions: Europe Vs Africa- Up to the Challenge?
Sitting
by the pool and weirdly; I don’t have to wonder whether I will be
able to sit outside tomorrow. Sunshine seems to work long hours every
day in this country… very different world though. I’m in
Lilongwe; the capital city of Malawi. You know how the capitals look
like in Europe. Many buildings stuck very close to each other; crowds
of people on the streets to and from ….everybody lives this hectic
lifestyle and accepted it as the norm of everyday life.
Lilongwe’s
got one main road. The taxi driver who was picking me up from the
airport said: “if
you want to go to Zambia; follow this road it will take you there.
Amazing!
I
haven’t seen many people on the streets. What’s impressed me
though was seeing women carrying their babies on their backs; the
suitcase on the top of their head; and they were riding a bike. We
people in Europe moan too much for nothing. And sometimes we are
grumpy because things don’t go as we wish. People over here smile
all the time and just go with the flow. They don’t need a lot to be
happy.
When
I was walking to the centre; I was looking for the pavements- How
European I am!
However,
no need for pavements…the road can be shared by cars, bikes and us
who depend just on their feet. To be honest, I prefer our style as
when it gets dark it’s difficult to avoid holes on the side of the
road. I am sure though that after a few days later I won’t be
worried even about my feet constantly covered by dust.
Anyway,
I feel it’s weird. I don’t really know how I feel now. Feeling a
bit lost as everything’s different here; and it might take a bit
longer to arrive and get grounded. I’d never say that I would feel
such a cultural shock!
I’m
happy for it though. It’s time to learn about different colours of
life. BTW (By the way) I got an offer to work in a primary school and
secondary school n Lilongwe. I’d do my theatre with the students,
and I’m provided with free accommodation and a lunch!
Quite
good isn’t it!
However,
this happened in my first day so I’m not sure how much I am truly
up to this and how much I can rely on this offer. Let’s see!
………………………………………………………………………
2.
Inspiration for my mind
Yesterday
I met Mr. Lamik Chimpena, the manager of World Vision in Mchinji.
This organization works through its members and employees to improve
health and education. They also cover food security and advertise
child sponsorship.
These
all has been focused on children. This man made me think about
cultural diversity; how to recognize respect towards certain culture
and where the line between tolerance and ignorance is…the ignorance
of laziness to make a difference for ourselves …Mr. Chimpena wakes
up every day at 4.30 am and goes for a run with his family. Then the
children go to school and his wife and himself go to work; he studies
masters at Uni( UNISA-University
of South Africa-
it’s a correspondence college based in Pretoria) in South Africa.
Apart
of that he’s got resources to be buying a variety of things he
thinks communities need. (He gets it from a worldwide organization
with unlimited financial resources). Mr. Chimpena decided not to help
the Malawian community through bringing the necessities BUT RATHER to
make a difference for himself first…teaching the villages but by
example…to be able
to change the community, we will have to change our minds.
Our mind creates our
reality. He said;
“The more I sweat,
the less I weep!’
This
might be one of the changes of mind the Malawians need. When I look
around I can see very poor houses made from homemade bricks …often
there are no windows in the houses.
Whole families are sitting on the door step and doing nothing or
roaming to and fro to kill the time. There is no rush.
My
first thoughts were: this
is something I should bring to my life..a different time perspective
of my every day.
However,
I think I was wrong. What I want to learn is to calm down and listen
to myself. To live
myself truly.
To
feel the flow.
Nevertheless,
not to slow down my mind …the mind has to be active to make the
move of my life forward. We need to start believing in our self and
accept who we are. Then we can make the difference for our self, for
the others…and we can get whatever we wish for …the truth is we
can get it ALL!
Personal
Note:
This reaction to this issue inspired me. There is no sustainability;
if we want to change everything immediately everything needs to go in
a natural pace as a reflection of the community ( Mr. Chimena said)-
the fact that he is able to use money as a tool rather than the aim
activates and inspires my mind. As I was worried recently that
money rules the world not because of its power, but because of
human weakness.
………………………………………………….
3.
Behind the door
I
got busy recently. I’ve started gaining what I came for. I realized
how thirsty I was in my life. My time in Africa waters my every day.
..to be able to grow the shape of my lifetime journey. I’ve been
teaching in a primary school called Mchiwi Mission. Apart of the
beautiful mountains that cuddle my “African “home by their strong
but powerful arms;
I
spend 4 days a week with children from standard 6. My class is not
very big. There are only 50 children in the class! The youngest is 9
years and the oldest is 17. It’s
weird!
I’d
normally perceive that this age range is quite big; therefore, it
would be difficult to prepare a lesson that would interest every age
group in my class. These kids are very curious though. Also very
thirsty…like me…though they haven’t got many people around who
would help them to find their source of water.
There
are two reasons that I’ve noticed so far about why not many
children go to school. Usual age for Standard 1 (which is equivalent
of our first year of school) is 6 years old. However, due to the
distance, the kids have to walk to school from their villages; the
parents send them often when they reach age 9.
The
reason why they postpone their children’s education is because it’s
not safe to be walking on their own early in the morning and after
dark. Not that school would take a place for so many hours a day. The
lessons usually finish at 13h00
pm at the primary and 15:30
pm at the secondary
school.
Truly,
I couldn’t imagine sending my child for one hour journey on their
own when they are 6 years old. However, it leaves me wondering why
the government does not establish school buses which go around
villages to pick the children up once in the morning and once in the
afternoon.
I
believe that sometimes this kind of investment can bring many
benefits for the country in the future. Unfortunately, to increase
school attendance is only the first step out of many. The problem
appears in teachers afterwards. They are not trained enough to
provide the students with high standard of information. Or is it a
lack of passion or motivation due to teacher’s income? Maybe
there’s no appreciation and therefore motivation from higher
positions; the ministry of education? Maybe because some teachers
that come through the government provides them with housing which
have no electricity (in their houses?)
The
second reason why children don’t attend school is the level of
education in families; and therefore the understanding of the
importance of
education in
parent’s eyes. Many parents see education as a wasting of time.
“When I work on
the field; I don’t need education”
Say
many of the local people.
Therefore,
the community development sector decided to bring on a new version of
the program called “back to school” in Chimteka-where I
volunteer. I got a chance to involve youth as a personal testimony.
I’ve
decided to try in terms of “Education Forum Theatre” which arises
issues, critical thinking; involves interaction and discussions, and
provides the community with a safe space for finding different ways
of life perspective. The plan is that youth brings the theatre to the
surrounding villages and we will try through their beliefs and
personal value in education to pass a message on the communities.
There
is ONE challenge!
- Every village‘s got its own chief and elders’ authorities. This
role is inherited from generation to generation.
Therefore,
it does not mean that the chief is educated (as many of them haven’t
gone through secondary education) and able to lead the village.
We
are meeting these chiefs this Wednesday to talk about the importance
of education and about the programme “back to schools”.
We
need them to allow us to bring this program to their villages. I
wonder what their reaction will be. I just hope that they will come
to represent the interests and needs of their community not only
their own ones.
Every
Wednesday I work in Chimteka. It is an area of 21 villages. There is
a health clinic, primary and secondary school; there are also
activities for little children. Our equivalent would probably be a
nursery school.
There
is a variety of services for people with disability providing
rehabilitation twice a month.
I
got a chance to work with people suffering from HIV and AIDS. We set
up a group of 27 people. The group is held once a week from 10 am to
2 pm; lunch inclusive.
I
haven’t felt so happy from a professional perspective for such a
long time.
I
have my own group and I am experiencing and growing through my
observation, empathy, and heart; and applying many different types of
drama.
Note:
I’ve never worked with such a group. It’s time to make a move! My
adventure of delicacy of the human being is “behind
the door” ...ITS
TIME TO OPEN IT!...
They
cannot speak any English. Fortunately, I’ve got a translator. Mr.
Francis who is the
main chief of the village where the centre is located. He is amazing
as his understanding of life is culturally detached. His way of
thinking is so contemporary and so clearly led by heart. He believes
in youth- he believes that there is always something we can do to
make the world better in everyday life. He is active in his heart!
I
don’t know him very well but I fell he’s very wise. His
eyes are big and bright up by kindness.
He knows how to stay calm and patient….to be able to give comfort
to everybody for shaping themselves in their own pace. Isn’t it
beautiful? It must be frustrating to understand the world a little
bit more than the others and still to be able to be giving and just
waiting …I am
amazed how much there is here for me to be learned.
Post
Note: To be honest,
there are so many problems in Malawi; one of the major issues is
nutrition. Mothers sometimes don’t even recognize when their
children are malnourished…just
because of a lack of education…people
don’t know what the human body needs and how we should create our
meals.
There
are also many disabled in Malawi who were born with a slight
abnormality. This could be easily fixed by physiotherapy in most of
the cases. Due to
the lack of information about a variety of problems and solutions
provided, the child grows up and the abnormality becomes a
disability…However,
everything seems to be rooted in education in an early age. If I’m
wrong let’s just consider then our future? This was the reason to
narrow the focus on youth.
…………………………………………………………………….
4.
Meeting Mr. Poverty
Poverty
…in terms of Africa...we talk about poverty all the time.
Although,
do we know what it really means?
Yesterday
I went to a local village called Nyoka. Before I came to Malawi I did
a little research about life down here; how African poverty looks
like. So I thought I was prepared – nothing could surprise me….
I
entered the village and I felt like in a fairy tale. Houses
everywhere around made from mud and straws. Some of them were bigger,
some were smaller. They were surrounded by other little buildings
made from the straw only. Later on I found out that these little
houses are used as storage places, outside kitchen and the place for
animals like chickens with little chicks, pigeons and goats.
Everything
around was made from mud. The children were running around holding
sugar cane in one hand and cooked maize soaked in salted or sugary
water (these things are considered as “kid’s candy”)
Actually,
we- me and my two other “white friends” – “AZUNGU”(White
man)- went to the village with the invitation of one student at the
primary school where I teach.
-Firstly
we thought she just wants to show us where she lives. However, when
we arrived to her fairy tale house full of poverty; we made a quick
friendship with everybody in the village as they started following
us. Especially the
little ones.
You
know, looking into the eyes of these beautiful kids with no shoes,
old dirty clothes running around to get warm in such day like
yesterday… (The weathers’ got colder; the wind was freezing and
the storm made us a company for the whole night).
This
BTW is supposed to be a dry season when you should start planting
seeds in your field; or this is just a beginning of the rainy season.
Rainy season usually starts at the end of November; but due to global
warming Malawians become very flexible in terms of the weather!
Let’s
come back to the village though. It was very windy; I had my leggings
and Chitenji (African skirt) on, t-shirt and my warm hoodie. Looking
at me you would never guess I am in Africa. I haven’t noticed a big
change of clothing of the kids. Cold or hot; the clothes is always
the same. Nyoka is a big village with many
Inhabitants.
They all have in their lives only each other and are hoping that they
find somebody who will save them and take them out.
The
girl, I call her FLO- introduced us to her father. The house door
slowly opened and I could see a man looking very old coming out from
the dark of the house. From
my quick look I could see that there were no beds; only space, empty
space and mats on the floor replacing the bed. No windows; just a
round house on quite a high step covered by a straw roof. The man
walked very slowly with a heavy step. His voice was very kind though.
Nevertheless; his eyes were very sad. When I looked at Flo and her
sisters; I saw the “inherited” treasure of sadness hidden in the
unspoken silence of their heart.
The
old man; Flo’s father was drunk which is not an unusual thing here.
He is 54 , but he looked to me as 70. He does not work as many
others. His only job is his garden. Again; as many others’….these
people try to sell their tomatoes, potatoes, onions to each other to
make a few kwacha to survive….how could they? The village is in the
middle of nowhere; and if you have no money you will never see any
other place in your country; you will only meet people in your
village and others who you are surrounded by.
They
are mostly (related) families anyway. The father asked us to pay
Flo’s school fees for secondary school. This came up as a reason of
our invitation. I looked at Flo when her father was asking us, and it
made me genuinely sad. I
saw in her eyes such a dilemma of her heart-
to be loving her
father unconditionally
just for the sake of being her dad…. In the same time to be so
ashamed of whom my
father is- a man who keeps himself in alcohol to kill the time and
forget poverty.
Understanding
this dilemma of love which is in our depth so pure gives you tears
into your eyes.
I
could probably help to this girl and pay her school fees…how could
I choose though, 1 girl from hundreds of kids?
How
can I LOVE 1 MORE than the others?
…How
can I contravene my
beliefs that there
are better things in life that brings you happiness and fulfillment
when these people cannot cover their basic needs ( see Maslow’s
pyramid of needs)?
Money,
money, money… If
I pay the fee would it mean sustainability for her better life? Don’t
you need more? …Your dreams, desires, encouragement, support,
patience and people who believe in you to help you believe in
yourself?
Can
this be covered by money?
…
What’s
more, what are their dreams about? Aren’t your dreams reflection of
your every day – what you see, feel, experience and it all is
processed and digested in your dreams?
Where
will you get this all you need to succeed in better life- when all
you can see is poverty?
I
thought I understood before I started understanding what I can’t
ever fully understand…materialistic
poverty.
On
the other hand, let me tell you. When I look at the children in my
class; I see happiness,
joy and the sparkle for
life…. Their
soul is not poor….
Now that I can’t be unhappy for their lack of creativity and
independent thinking that would let them be who they want to be from
the soul perspective… I just need to be patient and keep trying
offering everything I’ve got and who I am; especially
my imperfection…as
I realized imperfection carries many gifts for ourselves
– the two biggest are to be true
about myself when I am wrong,
and be able to
transform this weakness into strength,
The
other one is the beauty of forgiveness.
If we treasure these two qualities in our lives; we
will never stay in the same place of our life’s journey.
Then I hope we can get whatever we want to: we just need to wish for
it and never stop walking our life path….step
by step…!
I
just wish that those kids who make our future will be brave enough to
desire for a long life journey…step by step….
…………………………………………………………………………………….
5.
Tree Plantation
The
funeral time has started. Yesterday I attended one of these sad
moments. Malawian communities seem to value death more than life. I
felt sadness. Death is an interesting part of life. You can actually
feel that a funeral is happening even if you’re just passing by car
through the place where the ceremony takes place. The atmosphere is
heavy, full of silence saying so much by just being. The women sing
the songs and men lead speeches.
Even
though the general understanding of gender equity feels balanced to
Malawians, the women and men sit separately on left or right side of
the place where the funeral is held. It’s not allowed together. I
wonder what genders got Malaria -as this one seems to be way too
friendly to everybody; no matter what gender you are. It
seems like malaria is the one who understands equality precisely.
No matter who, just someone to die…from now on for next 6 months
some people call this time “a
funeral period”.
The
funeral can be spotted at every corner…death as a price for
poverty…people have no mosquito nets due to their price…one can
buy it for over 1000 KW (a few dollars)- but imagine how long one has
to be saving when most of the population in villages lives from
selling vegetables – tomatoes for 50 KW.I wouldn’t say it’s a
highly profitable business. Imagining there are people suffering from
AIDS with NO mosquito nets when the rainy season is just about to
start… it is so worrying; what’s more in last few days medication
for malaria ran out on public hospitals which are run by the
government. If you are wealthy – don’t worry…go to the public
clinic and pay a high price for your own survival…if you depend on
help from the government; good
luck to you!
Note:
People organize a funeral ceremony and everybody comes to cry. What
do we cry for? Do we
cry for the person or for ourselves?-or
are we feeling sorry for ourselves to be left here with feeling loss?
We cry but here the funeral brought me a different perspective of
sadness. People
die for treatable things. Looking
to their eyes, one can see a resigned heart that is trained by death.
To be grateful for every day coz death can come one day to any of us.
Once stays amazed how deep sadness you can feel. On the contrary
death’s acceptance of daily life. Hopes got a different odor here.
It’s covered by silent clouds of powerlessness. Hope hidden behind
fog…it’s sometimes hard to find it.
You
can feel this attitude in your every
step. Malawi
depends on its suppliers. The main one uses the UK. This relationship
is no longer alive. The only people who are affected by these
political arguments and misunderstandings are the
poor people who
usually live in the villages. There is more than 80% of the
population living in villages with no electricity depended on their
own growing of veg and crops to be able to survive.
There
is no way they can even dream about having their own business.
Stopping supplying of medication will cause a high percentage of
death. Even though they need is not available.
(Who
are they punishing – and for what?)
We
have a big fuel crisis in Malawi for the last few weeks. It’s
getting worse and worse. The prices of everything – food,
travelling etc keep going up due to expensive transport for
deliveries to smaller towns and cities. Cars trying to get fuel from
black market for the price twice or more higher than what it actually
costs; many people selling fuel illegally have been arrested.
People
cannot travel. Last weekend I decided to see more Malawi and went to
Salima placed by the lake. Suddenly I ended up half way through
Lilongwe due to lack of petrol. The trip was over.
Imagine
that many people do trip of their life by heading to the hospital
yearning for their treatment. No fuel- certain death. No treatment –
certain death. Having no fuel, that’s crisis indeed. However, it
does not take human lives away. No treatment means “start arranging
your own funeral”…sadly, it seems to me that there is more hassle
for petrol rather than medication!
Where
does this leave us? … It could be any of us…anytime….
Yeah...Funeral time; these last days I’ve been thinking about
gender division based on cultural settings; I’ve been thinking
about human rights, equality, oppression and empowerment.
I’m
walking at the market and buying some vegetables. I spot a woman
covered by a chitenji
over her face. Walking silently with her baby on her back. Baby’s
head was covered by chitenji too so I could not see the face
properly.
What
I saw, even though very briefly, was the woman’s face. She was
beaten up. By her husband?- or she just fell down the stairs?...( one
can’t find very often stairs in Malawian type houses) Seeing a
strong woman in her soul but panicking her heart ; trying to stop
tears in her eyes and trying to remember “ I can’t be weak, I
have to be here for my baby!” Can
she leave her husband?
There
are very few women who are financially independent even though they
are married. Very few!!! Apparently, there are two options what a
woman can do. The first one is to report her husband to the police –
if she’s lucky; her husband will end up in prison…what will
happen after once he is released though?
Who
will be punished then?
(From them two)
What’s
more, when the man goes to the prison; it’s difficult for a woman
to take care of herself and her children due to the fact that the man
is the one earning money for a living.
The
second option happens when a woman does not want to report her
violent husband.
I
wonder what is the reason for staying with him and forgiving him?
Is
it love or fear? Unfortunately, we all know the answer!
Anyway,
the couple visits the nearest chief who is trained, and therefore has
permission for counseling of couples facing domestic violence. I know
one of these chiefs. After my discussion with him I understood that
domestic violence is very common also- but taboo…. (Taboo or
culture – ask the Malawian man)
The
reasons are mostly alcohol, poverty and cheating of the partners.
Cheating of woman is punished by beating (I doubt there is a lot of
investigation in depth whether it was a case of cheating or of just
men being drunk).
Whereas
men in a marriage can go out and pay for services provided by
prostitutes; sadly very common.
There
is an organization called “SWAM”(Saving
Women & Men/Sex workers against men? Lol-No …Oh- I don’t
know-Sex Workers Association of Malawi?- ) …Working with people who
have contracted HIV The woman’s group goes around villages and
offers a preventative programme. The programme covers talking to
women who are HIV negative about protected sex, use of a condom, and
how to look after themselves etc.
These
women don’t know a lot about such issues. They are asking many
important questions and taking home with them condoms for their
husbands to use them when they use services of prostitutes. This is
the way women have to protect themselves. How sad in heart is this?!
Where
is love and dignity???
These
women can’t moan or complain. They can’t say how they feel, how
hurt they are. Actually, they can…but they will be beaten up. There
are a few charities and initiatives of working with women suffering
from domestic violence in Malawi.
I
have realized in my frustration trying to find the way how to stop
this cultural habit that due to such dependence of women on their men
from financial and housing perspective the focus should be on men in
the first place.
Working
with women experiencing domestic violence is very important and
necessary; the hurt
needs to be healed to be able to gain self worth in heart back.
However it would be necessary to be healing the injuries of body and
heart only! We need to go deep down and take the roots out. If I cut
the tree half way through; I’ll get rid of the branches that
represent the outcome of violence.
But
the problem is still there- as
the violence is born in the roots.
We
have to take the roots out to make sure that the tree of violence
dies.
The
roots of a violent man.
I
want to start working with men;
on their anger management. When men learn how to control themselves
they can start planting new trees; trees
of love, delicacy, true respect based on honesty and dignity one to
another.
I
wish this would not be such a huge bubble of isolation where every
action done by many becomes a norm. I wish we could look around and
see the humanity in each other…look
around and tell me what you see?
… Dialogue
between violence -and violence left out with powerlessness and
oppression…yes,
let’s cut these forests full of old trees down…and
lets plant new trees
that will last at last for the rest of our lives ! (If not for
centuries to come). A
plantation of them!
……………………………………………………………………………………………..
6.
Girl Child Education on Sexual Abuse
The
Constitution of the Republic of Malawi:
Chapter
4 – Human Rights
Paragraph
18 : Every person
has the right to personal liberty.
19.1
The dignity of all persons is inviolable
19.3
No person shall be subject of torture of any kind, or to cruel,
inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.
22.1
The family is
the natural and fundamental group unit of society and this is
entitled to protection by society and the state.
23.4
children are entitled to be protected from economic exploitation or
any treatment, work or punishment that is likely to …be harmful (
c) to their health or to their physical , mental or spiritual or
social
development.
24.2
Any law that discriminates against women on the basis of gender or
marital status shall be invalid and legislation shall be passed to
eliminate customs and practices that discriminates against women
particularly practices such as sexual abuse, harassment and violence.
“You
can never really understand a person until you consider things from
his point of view, until you climb into his skin and walk around it.”
Harper
Lee ( 1960) – To Kill a Mockingbird.
SILENCE.
This
is sometimes our answer when we face issues that we don’t want to
see. We don’t talk and just ignore the truth. IGNORANCE THOUGH…IS
NOT A SOLUTION. It just deepens the problem. Sexual abuse is one of
this brand of silence. Silence that makes the scar of our soul and
heart very deeply.
What
is sexual abuse? It is a selfish demand coming from one person to
another requesting sexual intercourse with no respect towards dignity
of other person…therefore; this is a letter to all girls who live
in silence…
Dear
Little woman,
The
world is sometimes very cruel in a way that we set up the norms for
ourselves in our societies. These norms should protect us.
Unfortunately, they’ve been abused and the effect is oppression.
Never listen to anybody who persuades you that something is right
when you feel the opposite. Human consciousness is our truth coming
from nature that has based our existence on love. True love never
hurts. The one that hurts is self –love. To be able to love others
we have to learn how to love ourselves. Though this is only one part
of love. If you remain in this stage love’ll never be completed.
People
who abuse your purity only love themselves.
Now
it’s time for you to be kind to yourself and treat yourself with
love! Who threaten you is not worthy for you to be living in fear.
Sexual offenders frightened because their consciousness is speaking
to them. They feel how wrong their deeds are and they want to save
their ego not to be embarrassed and judged by publishing their
weakness. Be brave and stop their action! You are not alone! There is
nothing you should be ashamed of. Your dignity and purity of heart
will never change unless you allow it. However, what can change is
your health condition.
Please,
don’t choose living the silence as this could affect your every new
day. Never give up your dreams for what happened to you. There is
always hope in our lives which activate our hearts. Though our hearts
activates our minds; which can make a difference for our every day.
Note:
Human rights of the Republic of Malawi claims in Chapter 4, paragraph
19.3…” Nobody’s got rights to hurt you both physically r
mentally…remember your dignity.
Parents
love your children unconditionally and listen to them by heart.
Listening by ear only can sometimes miss the important message …
Chapter
4, paragraph 22/2 …
(Each
member of the family shall enjoy full and equal respect and shall be
protected by law against all forms of neglect, cruelty or
exploitation.)
Protect
your children by taking seriously what they say. You are the law that
protects them as their parents. It requires a lot of courage to share
with you this intimate pain of dignity. Treat them in a delicate way
and support them to report the person who has sexually abused them.
Immediate action can save your girl’s life. There is a treatment
which if it’s applied within 48hours can protect against
contracting HIV and AIDS.
This
is a serious issue which could be easily dismissed by feeling ashamed
of this situation and remaining in silence. Silence is your enemy in
such situation as it can leave a scar to your girl’s life that
can’t ever be removed. Sexual abuse is breaking of human rights;
that can be referred to the part of children’s rights.
(In
paragraph 23.4 (children
are entitled to be protected from economic exploitation or any
treatment, work or punishment that is likely to be harmful to their
health or to their physical, mental or spiritual or social
development.)
Dear
Little woman,
You’ve
got incredibly high value and nobody’s got a right to take it away
from you. Freedom of the individual finishes there where the freedom
of another person s starts. If somebody does not understand it; they
need to get a chance to change it.
This
can only happen when we express our concerns about their lack of
respect, dignity and humanity.
This
cannot happen when we hide in silence! Breaking the silence is the
responsibility of not only affected children or parents; but also
us…society through each of us individually!
If
we wait for the others to start –nothing
will ever change!
Let’s start with ourselves –not tomorrow; but today and let’s
stop committing of crime that affects a whole body and soul of our
girl children!
Children
desire to know what pure love is!
If they don’t experience it in their own lives then they will learn
it. Experiencing true love means the ability of applying it in their
own lives. Let’s
stop this never-ending circle of sexual abuse and let’s start a new
circle of real love based on human delicacy and dignity!
……………………………………………………………………………………
7.
Land in the sky
I’ve
got 6 weeks of travelling ahead. I have decided that this time will
be about my fear. I don’t know how many fears I’ve got. It is
probably a big rainbow of colour my fears…many different colours,
many different strings attached to my past and shaping my future of
every day.
My
journey started in Blantyre in Malawi . It is a city that gave me a
different experience of life in Malawi. It reminded me of home a
little. Everybody was rushing and seemed busy with building their own
life. Although this is Africa. Sometimes I forgot and arriving to
some place ; my imagination pictures automatically the places I know.
My own experience versus my expectations of life that surrounds me.
How interesting to notice how strong attachments we can carry from
our lives which has been explained to us in a way that this is “
normal”…what
is normal?
What
does make it normal and acceptable to me? I found a place where
everything what we see as normal and correct has no meaning… I went
to the land in the sky; and I realized how complicated
lives we can live in the land of man although the world is so simple…
Just
being …
I
climbed Mulange Mountain, 3002 M high. This mountain is my first
hiked mountain. It’s considered as the third highest mountain in
the biggest continent in the world- Africa.
I
stepped out of my box and touched unknown to me.
I
hiked with no expectations and the mountain cuddled me with her
warmth and powerful and sometimes a little scary tenderness….
Somehow I call the mountain “she” maybe because she felt very
motherly and caring…I felt respect …actually, what does respect
mean? Here in
Africa, everybody says respect is what we need to give to each other.
It seems to me that
one has to make an effort to see the respect in ALL humanity of fear
which puts one into a box that limits his every step by a need to
control everybody else to protect himself.
The
fear that tries to create something – anything lost not to be hurt,
and in the end one will end up hurting himself… by strengthening
already thick walls of their limited “box” of life.
Does
respect have necessarily a cultural uniqueness, or is it just a
matter of the nature of a human being?
Why we sometimes don’t understand the way we respect each other?
Maybe it is closely linked with understand of love- when one wants to
love somebody; they need to learn how the other one needs to be
loved. If everybody loves from their own understanding and
expectations, the love might never be understood. The dialogue of
love will change into a monologue that can dig very fast and before
we realize it there will be a big deep hole between us. Then the only
way how we can manage to stay together is to create our box of
controlling each other …how
lonely we will feel then…
The
mountain is a big complex of different shapes, colours , strong
rocks, forests and fields full of flowers. It’s like visiting
different stages of “her “life.
When
one looks from the top, we can see her wisdom, calmness, curiosity
and power.
Through
visiting all these places; I was thinking about how little we people
are. We try to be
something but do we do it in a real matter of our being?
Is
it about us; our
body- soul- and spirit; or is it about masks that we created for the
others because we are afraid to be exactly who we are?
Hiking
my friend- mountain; I experienced my own therapy of honesty. One
cannot run away in front of themselves . Very often we put TV, music
or get very busy in mind just not to be with their self.
In
silence.
Truly
and critically…aren’t
we good runners?
…in front of
ourselves…?
I
left my headphones in my bag. I took up to the mountain only myself
with my fears- to fight them!
It
is interesting how our memory works .The memory is like a library.
You enter it and walk through sections of different stories of your
life. The books have no titles, no labels. They’ve got colours and
emotions. Find the
emotion and that will bring you true story that you might thought
you’d forgotten.
The library is a network that tames the stories to your present
being.
I
spent in my library 3 days and two nights. I was cooking on fire,
falling asleep with the melody of wood playing with the dangerous
heat, listening to their dialogue of needing one another. I walked
through the clouds….I felt them on my skin. It’s like a woolen
jacket of fresh thick air. I entered the land of the sky….
I
reached the peak and sitting above the clouds and just being made me
fall asleep. Such peace comforted me. I felt unconditional being.
I’ve never heard such silence.
The
fulfilling silence of every part of your body, mind ,heart and soul.
Unconditional being of everything.
Everything’s perfect and unique.
Why we always want to change ourselves, be
who we are not. I
always thought that we are so imperfect. Now
I know how perfect we are.!
Imperfection
is only a choice of each of us.
Don’t we want to
be who we truly are?
In
the end of my journey I stopped by waterfalls and I jumped into the
water to leave my friend mountain all of my old me...
I have overcome the fear from my true me.
The
sound has been slowly disappearing; the sound of life, birds, grass,
flowers…just the wind reminds. The wind which cuts off the noise of
life which is not yours; this wind makes you be with yourself…what
do you see? What do you feel? The peace distracted by the emotion of
your hidden consciousness. Is it sub consciousness; or is it you
being the best liar to yourself?
Running
away from who you truly are… running away from what you are running
away from. Let me
introduce you by every friend- Mulange mountain the space of your own
choice- who you are, and who you want to be. ….
Who
do you want to be?
Climbing
the rocks of which you cannot see the ending - you look down and your
step becomes too weak because of the power of your thoughts.
Reflections.
Why
do we look back and live the past in our lives? Why don’t we focus
on every next step we are making to climb the peak? What is the peak
of our life? How many powerful rocks do you have to climb to reach
what you want? And do you really want it?- or you think you should
want it?
The
scenery’s been changing, everything looks stronger, more grounded
for a reason. The mountain of different colours , different slope,
different height…the darkest colour of the mountains , very sharp
and steep slope, very solid and united piece of rocky earth reminds
me the wisdom; an old person talking through their life, by their
look. No educational lesson that you have to attend.
You
hear them talking when you’re ready to listen.
You
understand the silence. The next mountain is a bit higher. It feels
like in the process of rooting of its own stability; finding its own
connection with the land. The colour is lighter, tiny rocks,
sometimes little grass in-between; the process of melting and uniting
the power together. Do we need to be able do it? Power of thought, a
decision, self belief, a higher purpose of your own being? The last
type of mountains ‘got big rocks of different shapes …messy look-
almost chaos…the curiosity and wildness brings many options. Just
to choose and go! Where do you want to go?
It
is difficult to climb this mountain for her variety of shapes. It can
surprise and bring the unexpected. Are you up for exploring – or
are you going back down just to look and dream about its height?
Years later I might come back and see the stones and rocks uniting
together and settling down….and I know the mountain found itself in
its own being….
Where
will you find yourself?
8.
Drama Facilitation: “My Curiosity”
I
always used to say “I’m
working with what people bring from their lives”
and allow to look at closely in drama sessions. My practice with AIDS
support group proved me wrong. What I was doing through my sessions
‘preparation was setting up my expectations based on the aim of the
session. This
limited me during our work when the group didn’t respond in a way I
wanted or expected.
When
we work in this way; it can be time to time frustrating as the
different reaction makes us feel misunderstood
and useless as a
drama practitioner. My worry when I thought about drama as my
profession; was that one day I will use all I know and what
to do next? There
wouldn’t be anything new or special I could offer to patients.
What
I’ve learnt though was to leave the lesson up to the group.
I have discovered amazing beauty about what is important to the
group; what’s their worry and who
they are. My
limitation of the sessions fixed structure isolated me and took away
from me the ability of facilitation…
It
was replaced by “session dictatory”..based on wrong and right
answers.
There
is no correct or incorrect answer.
As
Boal points out when explaining forum theatre …theatre
is not bringing you a solution. Its providing you with a safe space
to explore various options…even those you know you would never use
in the real life.
So
I stopped having expectations, and I became more curious about what
would happen if I do this…. Then just to feel them, and be caring
for the delicacy of the moment.
This
new understanding of how to use a drama tool in terms of freedom to
explore individual needs started touching issues of relationships,
identity, gender role or equality.
My
original plan and expectation was a bit of “healing” considering
that the group consists of patients suffering from AIDS.
I was very wrong.
They
didn’t need to be “healed’ in the way I dictated it in my
imagination. They needed a
trustful environment to start exploring themselves.
I’ve
realized that my expectations at the beginning caused their
limitation, and was stopping them from opening up. They thought that
our session is an examination and all they needed to do was
guessing what I
wanted to hear!
This
discovery made me debate with myself about whether the use of drama
explained by basing on place or closed description of the focused
group (as Thompson mentions)- for instance drama in prison, or dram
with communities suffering from AIDS….limits your ability as a
practitioner ; whereas titling such as “ drama of what we don’t
talk about-“ or “drama of my fears” etc…opens
more options for the group to find what is there for them.
What’s
more, the practitioner does not have to worry that he won’t be
understood; or it won’t be suitable for the group… (This
awareness brought by a feedback)- That’s proven my personal
discovery. If one would ask me what the sessions with the support
group were about, I’d say – about the group as a whole based on
each individual . Nothing specific as I have always trying to link
the next session with what has brought up in the previous time.
That
was my aim. What happened in the session was
entirely up to the group.
I’ve been practicing sensitivity
and listening
to each individual; make
them feel safe to allow themselves to be curious about themselves.
When
we had time of reflection; the group summed up the three months of
working together as time of learning about love; about how important
it is to keep in mind that everybody’s different and we need to
learn how they had to be treated through love.
Furthermore,
the work aroused thoughts about women and men from gender perspective
and about caring for those who are reactive.
The
main title was love though. I was feeling worried at the beginning
that the patients don’t gain anything out of our sessions.
Then,
when I became curious I allowed us both- the group and myself to
learn together…
I
hope I’ll always be curious.
This was Ill be ensured that I’ll never run out of the repertoire.
As there are no days
in our lives that would be the same….
Being
curious. My
curiosity.
……………………………………………………
9.
There where there is no time… “Discovered”-
the Land
of Sand!
Silence.
…Many people consider this “sound’ as empty…I’ve started to
understand recently that the silence has got many colours. The
mountain gave me a taste f silence above the clouds; such a peaceful
and heavenly fulfilled silence that is giving you something higher;
some higher perception of yourself which makes you think about who we
really are in terms of the world , the universe and the being. How
wonderful it is not to know all the answers but still feel thirsty
for knowing …
My
new experience of other colour of silence is placed in Bazaruto
Archipelago in Mozambique. Bazaruto Archipelagos got 5 islands; sand
dunes and unique coral reefs. It was the 8th
December, and I’ve decided to do something I’ve never done
before. I went on the boat to visit these beautiful islands.
It
was early in the morning when 3 and a half hours later the boat
stopped in the middle of the Indian Ocean and we were told: “here
is the equipment, take the one that suits you; and you’ve got one
hour to snorkel”
I’ve never snorkeled before so I was a bit shocked as I was hoping
for at least a brief introduction to snorkeling for those who have
never done it before.
This
is Africa though, and whatever you do, you have to find your own
way…so I jumped…!
-it
took me quite awhile to learn how to operate the flippers not to
drown and how to breathe under the water. I’ve realized that it can
make one feel very claustrophobic not to be able to breathe by mouth,
and trust the tube that it won’t get any water in…that day I
drunk a lot of water from the Indian Ocean.
I
had to overcome my fear many times before I was actually able to see
those beautiful fish and corals.
I
observed myself and it got me thinking about the life...I
have to keep trying and stop worrying about what others do or think.
Everybody has got their own pace, experience and purpose of what they
do.
The
life is not a competition. I have to keep trying and stop worrying
about a failure. When I was in the water, I really wanted to see the
fish and everything what hasn’t been discovered by me yet. For that
I had to overcome my fear of breathing under the water ;( I had to
let my control go) I had to understand that I cannot control the
water, that I’m in something a lot more powerful than me. I had to
give up my control and just trust. That was a big deal considering
the option of drowning. Once I’ve managed to calm down I started
seeing. It was like opening a secret door from the underworld.
I’ve
never imagined that I’d be looking closely into eyes of such a
beautiful and colourful fish and Id see the corals a live
being…everything so slow, like the time perspective would have a
different meaning...Everything down there’s got its own purpose.
Nothing’s trying to change what they are. It would be nice if we
people would be able to manage to do the same in our own lives; to be
just who we are.
Overcoming
the fear is a good discovery about ourselves. One never knows what
their reactions going to be. Our own challenge creates a safe space
to practice whoever we want to be. Because it’s all who we are. We
make our choices for ourselves. The life is like a Sunday market;
many little shops offering their “best”. It’s up to us whether
we buy anything and make a use of it in our lives, or we just leave
it.
On
the way back we stopped on one more island that was made only of
sand; the island where the only shade is your own shadow, the island
where you can print your own track into he sand and a minute later
the powerful sea clears everything out like nobody’s been there
before…back to its perfection and purity…seeing such beauty
shining in the sun by its gold colour and playing with azure blue
water reminding one of eternity…it’s like stepping to the land of
no one….in the middle of the sea…everybody can come , but nobody
can take it with them…only the way is to keep the sacred place of
purity in their heart; the purity of being found in its infinity and
silent invitation to a life….the invitation of beautiful new
channel of every day…as your every step prints your “being” in
the sand…you have to keep walking…to be… the past is taken by
the sea …what is important is the foot track you are making right
now..
I’ve
never thought how difficult it can be to live the present.
It’s
easy to live the past, our memories, our feeling sorry for ourselves,
our wishes…or in the future- to plan and chase what we want to
achieve …how can we achieve anything when we’re not living right
now?
In
Africa there is no time. People are moving in their own flow because
they are not chased by time…they live right now.
Surprisingly,
to live with no time perspective in your own pace it’s still
possible to get done many things…the only difference is that …you
just smile more…so then there concludes only one question:
What
does time mean?
10.
FREE FALL TO LIFE
“Check
one, check –check, two, three, four and five”
Stand
up, turn and walk slowly to the edge of the ramp. Hands up. Look up
and 5-4-3-2-1- JUMP!
…wind
is coming through my ears, my heart beats faster than ever and I am
….about a suicide, the natural way of being which loves ourselves,
the natural reaction in a danger is as our own protection. Nobody
wants to die….how the person who decides to commit a suicide feels?
Where is the self – love?... the basic instinct?
What
can happen so bad that people sometimes lose their hope?
I
take a deep breath and stop listening to the voice counting ….I am
switching off my mind, my rationale and am jumping….2 seconds later
bravado starts panicking…being in the space attached to nothing on
the same level with the top of the surface speeding me free…fall
down to the Victoria Falls.
111metres.
4 seconds my brain blocks out and I can only see a wild river Zambezi
getting closer and closer. I am time free- no thoughts going through
– no breath as It’d be 4 seconds out of my fly reality …suddenly
, the rope stops and I am going up; my body is twisting around and I
am standing back up and falling free again…and again and again…;the
rivers getting closer and then its disappearing…
I
am like a bird swimming in the air that separates the unity of the
earth…the cracking in the ear I bungee jumped to this hole in the
world by the Victoria Falls and I’ve survived.
I
got back to the bridge and appeared in a different world ….in my
own world of adrenalin bumping in my head. I was a little bird for 4
seconds; I was a potential suicide, I was somebody who never wanted
to die…
Two
days later a girl jumped over the bridge as many other people did
that day…5-4-3-2-1- JUMP!....Moments of a 4 second free
fall…suddenly , the rope snapped and the girl fell to the river
…wild river full of rocks fighting with the strength of the river
over the rapids…15 seconds under the water …..No life’s coming
to the surface …silence. Everybody is desperately looking down the
bridge to see assign of life….. Silence…there is she...overcoming
the rapids and following her basic instinct of survival …she
won…the river let her go (for this time)…. The bungee jumping
crew helped her out of the water and took her to the hospital…she
survived …is it a miracle; or luck- or destiny? …
Knowing
what happened it makes one think about life…it could have been
me…what would I do? I don’t want to die…However; I’ve taken a
decision to jump…voluntarily. Yeah, it could have been me. That’s
right. However, could have really? What is the relation between our
destiny and our choice?
Moreover,
is there a destiny> Furthermore, if there is a matter of choice
only how come I cannot control it? It could have been me and the only
control that I held on the bridge was the act of jumping. What
happened after that was my risk of life.
So
what is the correct answer?
Are
our acts and our lives only in our hands?
Is
it up to a higher power (and what does this mean?) or what is it?
Also, is there a correct answer? And do we really have to know it?
…………………………………………………………………………
11.
The Answers for the Questions
Imagine
9050m/2 of freedom. The
land of the expanding self. Walking wherever you want to. No
restrictions of anything, no touch of human being, just freedom to
breath. Walking and
discovering different emotions of world…a bush, a meadow, a beach
by the river Luangwa, a desert…Those places where you are free but
constantly in a danger of an attack by a stronger habitant. To be
able to survive one has to be always ready to run, to fight, to kill,
to die… this is a beautiful South Luangwa National Park, in Zambia;
one of the largest and most beautiful safaris in Africa
(apparently)…taking a game drive through a safari and seeing all
the life in there; it brings you into a completely different
world…such peace expanded in a huge space. Silence which is very
tranquil; but also threatening as this quiet sound can mean your
quick death in any minute if you are not sharp in your eye enough.
I’ve seen elephants…they’ve got so much skin; they look like in
a pajamas….I’ve seen Impalas and Phuku ( Kudu?) ; such smart
elegant and soft animals that belong to group of antelopes. They
seemed to feel quite comfortable in the company of zebras as it was
their most common surrounding. The river was occupied by hundreds of
hippos and time to time we were lucky to spot a crocodile sunbathing
in the river. The river gave me a beautiful present before I left
Zambia- amazing and perfectly shaped in many sharp colours…
…sunset. Africa
should be proud of such treasure.
Actually one out of many – coming to Europe for instance ; all what
we do is we build as many high buildings as possible and the beauty
which has been here for us to make us smile and to keep us
understanding more the purpose of life out of scientific perspective
has been disappearing .
I
had many discussions with many people who I met through travelling.
I’ve also seen many unbelievably beautiful and perfect places on
the Earth that has been lacking a scientific explanation…human
being is very curious being yearning for developing further….that’s
what science is for.
However, sometimes we
don’t need to know all the answers….and
it does not mean that where there is no explanation – it does not
exist. For some matters we have to gain a higher level of
understanding which requires to abandon the science for a minute and
see what will happen !
Maybe
we will see a lion, the king of the jungle- as this does not happen
very often…to have this happen is very rare. I haven’t seen the
lion yet…maybe I should ask more questions but
be ready for less answers!...
12.
What makes me to volunteer.
One
of the principles of my life is curiosity; to understand more about
who we people are in the (primal) nature of being. I am curious about
love.
My
name is Miss Pavla Cveckova and I have studied applied drama. I have
completed a BS in Social Pedagogy and I gained knowledge of
humanities, art and education. Through my drama practice in Africa,
in Malawi where I established a support group suffering from AIDS and
had introduced through a combination of applied drama and therapeutic
drama, techniques; and, a new way of personal development through
community cohesion and intimacy of each individual. I have started a
project targeting under age prostitutes where I encouraged human
values as well as offering new skills. Prostitution is not the only
way to get out of poverty and higher social status based on a
financial stability. I introduced drama approach in a matter of
counseling in terms of domestic violence as well .My role is manyfold
as a volunteer… an educational reporter, helping or assisting with
education and to help both students and teachers to engage. My
life as a volunteer has formed my character and made me what I am
today. It was not a waste of time, money and energy…and to find
ones vocation is all part of volunteering.
And
in my relationships?
This
is what I have found in my own life…but there’s been even more…
I have defined more who
I am as a person…I
know in my relationships of the future I want to trust
my partner because it makes the relationship feel unbreakable…
I want to feel my
partner’s love every day freshly
as it makes me secure and stronger in myself…I wanna have a
deep connection with God together with my partner because
it means we will be connected in a very intimate and special way… I
wanna feel my “one”(partner) sees
the world through my eyes
cause then I am able to give him all of my heart to make him happy in
a way he needs it ;and I learn his way very quickly too….
And
my work?
I
wanna job where I can cuddle hearts because it fulfills
me.
I
wanna find people who feel
and think or need the same
to be happy in their career because I am stronger when leading
others…!
I
wanna work towards my own
company because I
know I can do it.
I
wanna work with challenging
people because I
like winning and learning along the way and I
want to feel successful!
Love.
I’ve learnt that love has no conditions. Love cares for you. Love
never hurts. Love strengthens. Love heals. Love makes you smile. Love
is not fear.
Since
Miss P wrote this she has returned to Africa – this time to South
Africa and has is in fact volunteering with inmates of
Pollsmoor Prison in Cape Town
doing applied drama once a week. She has also used her skills as a
counselor and has not only registered a company in the UK but also
created a monthly online radio show about her experiences. She has
found herself and it was all down to her volunteering
in Africa! Africa
opened up her heart to her inner self…and by finding out what she
wanted to do; she was able to aim for it…and achieve it!
Looks
like she got her
dream…but
not in the way she expected it to happen!!!The
team at Africa Unite! would like to extend a warm hand to all those
of you reading this ;and to invite you to volunteer yourself too when
you can!- just like Miss P! Vuka Ukhanya! Arise & Shine!
……………………………………………………………………………………
